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Really I knowWords of advice for a friend roll off the tongue freely and with exuberant confidence. Determination to influence through encouragement fuels the hope; fulfilling the need to share serves your passion. To help others before you is noble. It is when the tables are turned, that those feelings elude you as soon as the “I know” slides off the tongue.
I love my...Fill-in the blank: I love my __________. How to write Notes(Topic is in relation to my previous blog, Art of Writing)
The beginning to any story is the summary. This only has to be 5 to 8 sentences. Say what you want to say in a sequence of start to finish. Treat it as your elevator pitch and grab your audience. Describe the story in the summary as if it is your desire, your intention. Once you have this, stick to it. And a tip, the key to doing is, do; don't refine the story before you know what it is. I'm good...When, how are you? is answered with "I'm good." What does that mean?
Good means happy, content, peaceful, adequately challenged, positively focused, cautiously optimistic, by Lisa Blessinger of the Examiner. Personal Freedom from Finances, seminarI left Memorial weekend to Vancouver for a three day intensive seminar that I was describing as a seminar about finding personal freedom from finances. When all said and done the course was called Millionaire Mind Intensive a Peak Potentials seminar by T. Harv Eker, it was intensive and did exactly what I expected it to do - set me free.
At the start, the trainer asks attendees to give their during the next three days because, "How you do anything is how you do everything." If you are always picked last, or miss out on opportunities, or blame things on circumstances, this will carry into every facet of life. It is the mind's job to protect, anticipate pain, and to warn of danger. It creates a sense of comfort thereby crippling action in the possibilities or what if's. At the earliest of ages, beliefs or the truth are engrained. With growth the beliefs either still agree with the mind or unease the mind. It takes awareness, understanding and reconditioning to change.
At the begining of the seminar you are asked to rate your top three non-supportive beliefs or fears, as a benchmark. You are immersed in a room full of energy, all directed to the same purpose by the trainers - fostering a safe place for change. You are walked through confronting your fears and your dreams. Nurturing your mind to believe that there is only a choice between the fear and the dream; confront the what if and the not knowing, to understand and tame the fear. They arm you with reconditioning tips and tools, it takes 90 days of doing to re-do a lifetime of conditioning.
My Key Learnings:
Grow your passive income: Make your money work for you by investing and minding your business. Never work again by making enough money to cover expenses.
Manage money better: Make it a habit, no matter the amount of money you are managing to pay money to 1. investments and/or passive income 2. Long Term Savings 3. Education 4. Necessities 5. Short term play money 6. Give back to others.
There are 4 money personalities: saver, spender, avoider, monk. Take Olivia Mellan's money personality quiz: http://www.moneyharmony.com/MHQuiz.html
Then, find balance and set structure to form a new habit.
Two things that follow me through any step I take, "Everyone always does the best they can at the time" and "How you do anything is how you do everything." I have a millionaire mind!
You too can have a millionaire mind by attending in-person (ask me about one of my complimentary tuition vouchers) or a tele-seminar offered during the month of June. There is no better time than now to act! FocusI started this blog, then got bogged down by my own thoughts. My need to plan how I would write, what to write, and to whom created a situation of analysis paralysis. When reading books like Eat Pray Love or the Power of Now, I think about the situation even more. When talking about writing, I say "I need to write" instead of saying "I want to write." In that situatiion, that need landslides into a whole new list of obligations, then I either push it away or hurry it to be done. Having a Type A personality has led me to where I am now. I want to be Type B. To me this means that I trust my intentions to guide me through steps to being a writer to find my voice. To my readers, I can only promise that there will be randomness to this blog at first and then it will get more refined as I learn. Today is nowRelease the past and the future
Stand still in thought
Awaken all the senses
Be in the moment
The feeling illuminates
The energy flows
Life begins and occurs now
The ultimate truth
Love Karma“Everyone wants to be taken care of.” - Everyone wants to be loved. Everyone wants to take care of another person in a parent-like-manner. A relationship that is mutually nurturing makes each other stronger together. “He believes the key to marriage is a happy wife” - Shoot for the stars and you will get them, no questions asked. Your-self worth shines when he smiles at the real you. He lives for the purest reason to make you happy; you deserve to be happy. “When I am too independent I fall apart” - The thought of sharing the load with another person seems scary. The dream of happily ever after follows us from childhood, but scares us as an adult. Trust originates with the self and passes onto the other person. You run to from the fears clinging to the picture of great love. “It’s All in Your Head” - Your existence is a pure state of self doubt. The face that once stared in the mirror, glimpses at what used to be. The cause is anyone, but your own. It lingers until it become too heavy. “The better me attracts him.” - Accept love when you see it. Ask for it and demand it. If you don’t want things to change do not let them, but know when a change needs to be made before it is too late. He will love you more, the more you let him. Embrace love and the karma will continue to flow into happily ever after. Beer as a CarbWhen talking about a healthy diet: what every parent wants to hear,"Wait, I have carbs, I drink a lot of beer!" The child could only respond telling the parent how beer is really enjoyable. It was evident that the conversation would not last long, as the child stopped listening as the parent's eyes rolled through the telephone. The mother misses the fact that drinking beer is an enjoyment. Being categorized only as an "alcoholic" beverage, beer gets a bad name. That label is imprinted since birth and only removed by the child to pledge that the past will never repeat itself - for the love of beer! Art of Writing"Art of Writing," by Jennifer Vaughan Sketch the outline
Fill-in with color
Blend the colors to inspire
Notes
Refine
Story Moving OnTo set expectations, this exercise is about you and you only. There is no blaming others or yourself. This is a reflective look at how you feel about a given situation, to discover why and how to move on from it.
As I said before and will reinforce, the only one that can change yourself, is yourself. That means that only you are accountable for your actions and your feelings. You cannot change the situation, it is the past. You cannot change the other person; it is hard enough to change your patterns of behaviors and beliefs so please do not rely on the statement, "if only they would change, it would be better." If you find yourself saying that last statement, STOP and take a look at yourself.
The key to your self-discovery is wanting to change and taking action. It is easy to say I have to change, but often times it never moves out of being a thought. The "I" is your biggest critic - I should have done this, I should have done that, I this or that. STOP blaming yourself and move on from being the victim of the past. By breaking down the barrier of self, you are ready to explore yourself.
Ask Yourself,
1. what happened?
2. how did it make you feel then?
3. why did it make you feel that way?
4. do you feel the same way now?
5. do you want to feel this way?
6. If not, what will make you feel better?
7. Go do #6!
The process of Asking Yourself:
1. Please fill in the blank with your personal situation to describe what happened.
2. There are two buckets, happy or sad (mad is included here). Which one are you feeling and to what degree (on a scale of 1 to 10)? Break down #1 in this manner until you cover all the whole situation.
3. This is where you will spend most of your time. There are concrete facts that x happened so y happened, the more obvious. Then, there is your subconscious. This can feel very deep inside you almost too deep to find, but it is there staring you in the face in the mirror; this is you, your actions and feelings that have been confirmed through past experiences that reinforce your beliefs. We learn from our parents and our surroundings at a very early age and hold onto these for years to follow. There are some things that are our of our control, mainly other people's actions, that have a deep effect on us. It is not the person or event that affects us, rather the feeling created that we associate with it.
4. People change, our beliefs change. Does what happened agree with your current beliefs? If you are struggling to accept the situation, you are fighting with the inner sense of yourself. Remove the anguish by moving on to #5.
5. It is a simple yes or no answer. But, remember to honestly break free from being the victim so you can say your answer confidently.
6. Avoid reactive statements such as "I don't want to feel x way" to an action statement such as "I won't feel x way by..." Move to an action oriented state in a constructive manner (ie. do not inflict self harm that will make you feel good momentarily but hurt much more later; you will be back at #1).
7. This is the step where you put words into action, by doing. You remember the answers to 1 thru 5, but this time they guide you to a different place, with the goal a better place.
Life is full of patterns. You wake up, you go to work, you come home to play, and you go to sleep. All of the in between is similar, but different in so many ways. We are creatures of nature. The next time you are in a similar situation, hold tight to the past instance, but only tight enough to evaluate the current situation with more clarity to ask, is it really similar? You cannot relive the past, therefore no one situation will ever be the same. Put faith in the present. Hold onto the intentions and trust yourself that you will take action. We are all human and make mistakes. Create the inner critic in a more positive way; it is not that you failed, but how you pick yourself up. The past is the past, but today shapes the future. Man SpeakMen are simple. They think about sex and sports. If you want a man to listen to you, add "boob" to whatever you are saying and watch his reaction.
Here is a great example of how simple a man thinks. A woman and a man are sitting at a bar watching soccer, the man looks over to the woman and says, "Technically, we could have watched this at home." That is it. The woman starts to think that wants to watch it at home instead and says they could leave at the half and catch it there. The man questions why leaving is an option, so she explains. He says, well I was just stating that we could have watched it at home, but we are not.
Knowing this, spare yourself the added thought by not looking too far into what he said - technically means technically, not emotionally. The only one that can save yourself from yourself, is yourselfThis is an email that I wrote to my close friends and family on April 19, 2007. Please do not get hung up on The Secret - some people believe it as a practice, but I think of it more in general terms of staying positive that good things you want, focus (work to gain) on will come your way. I watched the movie, but it was not that it was my guide. I was a fast learner of myself, so these principles I was already working on, but the movie affirmed that I was on the right path. Email Subject: the only one that can save yourself from yourself, is yourself I have to share with you my feelings, my life for the past 2 months, and my reaction to a movie that [name omitted] suggested I watch, The Secret.
I am very proud of myself that I found the secret to life and the movie affirms my feelings and thoughts towards myself and my life. I would say that I need to improve my positive feelings towards certain situations and follow through on the belief that my wants will come to me by thinking about them. This is the idea of The Secret in a nutshell - ask (confirm what you want and be grateful for what you have while you are wanting what you want), believe (really feel the end results of what you want), and receive (allow yourself to receive the want).
For the past couple months, I have been trying to be a better person. This has not been an easy task and I have asked myself what is this all for, what will I get in return. I will get what I want. I need to figure out what I want, internalize this, and accept that they will come to me in time.
No longer do I dwell on what I cannot change, what I cannot control, instead I focus on what I want. I can go climbing because I want to because I really like to. There are no more, I have always wanted to do that kinda phrase, I no longer worry about what could be because what I know what is, is right here and now. I cannot change anyone but myself. My caption on myspace is "the only one that can save yourself from yourself, is yourself" - you can only learn from what happened and move on to a place that suits you, suits your wants. My therapist has said what do you want...I am figuring it out little by little. I do things because they make me feel good. When they do not, I do not do that again - why make myself miserable. The only person that really cares is me, no longer do I care what people think because I bring it back to me, is this what I want. I feel very philosophic now a days and a little corny at the same time telling you all this, but I truly feel that I attract the people that I am around because I surround myself with the people that I respect and are worth my time, so I know that you will realize the good that is in my life, see my confidence, my growth, my spirit and absorb this and take it in. I wish you all could feel the bliss that I do, to finally be happy. This is happiness with me. I am happy to be alive, to have great friends, and to be able to do things that I like. I am learning to love myself and be dependent on me to make myself happy. I have filled the void that I have been looking for someone else to fill my whole life. I am wanting/waiting for the day that I can be me and be loved as me in a relationship. I am more confident that I know me, I love me and I will be able to love myself while loving another person. I am now able to give my love to someone, w h ether it be friends, family, or a guy without losing a piece of me. I bring me to the table and that is all that I can give and can change. I attract what and who I want. Others will see this and will want to be around me. I feel at peace with myself and a co-worker mentioned that she has noticed that I am at peace; it was amazing to see that others were internalizing the feelings that I was putting off. If I continue to feel confident, love for myself, happiness for me, only good things will come my way.
I always say...that everything that I wanted just fell into place. Anything meant to be will be. Nothing that I really want should ever be hard. These are all true because I picture what I want, I realize what I want and I focus on getting what I want. The means to getting the wants were never difficult. I had faith that they would happen and they have. For example, I am amazed that I am working at Microsoft, buying a condo, and in a lifestyle that I like. I wanted all these things and if I continue to think and feel for the things that I want they will happen. Another one I say is everything happens for a reason. These are the things that I am grateful for - these are things that may be good or bad - these are the things that helped get me to where I am. Was I hurt that [name omitted] broke up with me, yes but it got me to where I am now and I am grateful that I got my heart hurt and realized that I needed to love myself before I could really ask or want anyone to love me.
I have said that I don't want a boyfriend because I want to focus on me. I want to figure out what I want. I want to make my life what I want. I am the creator of my life. I do what I want, when I want because I want. Does this sound selfish?? To some yes, but to me it is best to know what I want and what I like before I can open myself to others wants. Together we can have a mutual relationship - this relates to boys and friends. It feels good to be me. For once in my life I can breathe free, I am happy, and I am happy to be me. I do not need alcohol to talk to friends when I go out - I can be me and I don't care if others think this or that about me because deep down I know who I am and I am a good person that can hold a conversation, is likeable, is smart, is pretty, and confident. All these things I needed others to validate about myself. I have internalized that I am the only person that can make myself feel better. Of course, when I slip I have all my true friends to help me remember why I am all those things and bring me back. The feeling is hard to keep, which is why most people give up. I want to be a better person and this is the only thing that I can see, there is no turning back and there can only be good from here out. I no longer focus on the negative and only what is to come or what is right now and I am the most alert, awake and determined to do and be good - for me and those around me. From the movie, "You have the pen, you choose what to write" I have found many of Natasha Bedingfield's songs very inspiring and one that I listen to a lot is "Unwritten." I am facing the world, and as [name omitted] said today "The world is my Oyster."
I thank you all for being there for me and I will be there for you in many ways. I am moving in the right direction to care for myself, so I can continue to care for myself while caring for others.
Who I am begins now...
The focus and goal of my writingI need to internalize and experience my goal by putting it out there to all my readers. I need your support. There is a quote I read on a business billboard along these lines, it is not how people treat us, but how they make us feel that people really appreciate. I need to know if you like what you read, if you relate, or if you want me to address something that has been eating at you. I want to write. I want to connect with you. Tell me how I can do that and I will. I want to write. I dream of having a following. I've been crafting just the right idea to make it right the first time, that it has been crippling me for months now; I relinquish this to write. I am certain with practice I will get better and the opportunities will come. I want to travel. I want to experience life. I want to share my experiences with you. In the ultimate sense I want to write a book. I value human nature and can see all aspects with empathetic eyes. My Independence DayI open my journals tonight, almost two years since my Independence Day. This was a day marked with the greatest pain I have ever felt, a day that I remember as if it were yesterday. I hit rock bottom. I cried for hours until there were no more tears - bless my mom for patiently waiting until the wailing stopped and a more cohesive me could let her know that I was okay. The hours after that seemed like forever and a day, as I went full circle hashing my life until that moment my heart left my body. I opened the flood gates to an eye opening experience. I went to sleep with an empowering peace. I kid you not, I was so at peace that I was afraid that I would die in my sleep from this foreign feeling, it was too good. The next morning I went for a hike by myself. This was exactly what I wanted to do. I appreciated the solitude of nature and left the world behind to embracing myself - I was the happiest I had ever felt!
The year to come was tiring mentally. I held onto the feeling of the happiness that night and day after as I walked into the unknown, what it was to be me. That night was just the start of a very long road to self discovery. For first couple weeks, I had a challenge to sit in my own skin which is something that I describe as uneasy, fidgety, and unknown territory. I knew what it was to make others happy, but not myself. I help people love me, so I would love myself. I was determined to be a better me, so I would love myself. Most days I asked myself what is my ROI? I constantly asked myself for what? This was the question that I set out to figure out. The issues that I dealt with and the next steps are my story to who I am today.
A year ago, I proudly knew (this is key!) that I was a confident, strong and independent woman. I was able to write a list of my likes and dislikes in seconds with no hesitation - this was a test I had failed a couple months after my Independence Day. At this point, I had been single a whole year, this is something I had not been since I was sixteen. I discovered what it meant to be in a relationship with myself before I was able to commit to another person. I did play in the waters, to test the waters really before I was ready to commit to another. On that anniversary I declared a shift in my priorities, I wanted to stop partying to have more intimate and focused fun and stronger relationships, remain sexy and confident without flaunting my sexuality, be healthy and fit, well rounded, creative, easy going, fun loving, and find the right fit at work for my interests. I was opening my world up to a refined me and accepting all that it had to offer, again. I was ready to not be single, to love again. I was comfortable that I could handle the next steps, one at a time, to make it into a secure, happy and healthy relationship - something that I put on my 2008 commitments. It was a few days after the anniversary of my Independence Day that I met my now husband. We were at the right time and place in our lives to accept each other that it was just right! I had to break down a few barriers I created to be independent, but the communication channels were open and honest that it was okay for me to be me and he accepted all of me.
This time of the year for me is no doubt symbolic and almost unintentional in terms of the growing that occurs within me at this time of the year. I wish to share the past two years with you and the road to come. I want to touch you and grow you; this is my gift to you. I went through the hardship, I understand and want support you through my words. It is my nature and passion to help others. I will also be honest to tell you that while I am strong, confident and independent there moments where I relapse, but I emerge me every time - a better me! Finding the Beautiful YouMy favorite musical artist is Natasha Bedingfield. Her lyrics helped me through a time when I needed the words to explain myself, my road of self discovery, and my hope to finding me.
I have extracted lyrics from Natasha's song "Wild Horses" from the album UnWritten as my inspiration - to finding me, the beautiful me that was hidden inside.
Move on to the girl you want to see.
Break free of the fear.
Don't be scared.
Envision yourself, run free.
Abandon your old self.
Tell the world how you want to feel, show your personality.
Attract the envy to all that.
FoodtellingFoodtelling - like storytelling but the story is told with food.
Food is an important part of all our lives. It is at the at the center of birthday parties, holidays and special events. For travelers, it's a destination. Each ingredient is interpreted differently by all. A pleasure to all. And, a mystery to some.
Best Italian: Tavolata
Best Cuban sandwich: Paseo
Best grinder: Hopvine
Best pizza: Stellar
Best Mexican: Tacos Guaymas in Fremont
Best Cask beer: Maritime Pacific Brewing Company
Best Nitro beer: Hale's Ales
Best Bottled beer: Deschutes Brewery
Best Wine Label: Bitch
I'll share a story about one of my favorites, if you share one with me! Success DefinedMy Definition of Success: 1. The ability to network. To fuel an idea into action, you need momentum and this is where who you know, is just as important as what you know. 2. Advance yourself and others. Karma is real, whatever comes around goes around. I live by the idea of treating others, as I would want to be treated. 3. Passion. Have an interest to learn to advance your knowledge and skills. To focus your time, effort, and money on what really matters. My PassionPassion: I want to make a difference in other people's lives. To spark thought into others, so they can decide how to react to enable them.
My medium: writing
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